A Nigerian man talked about how he lost a job opportunity because he used the word “we” too much in an interview.
He explained in a post on his X (previously Twitter) page how he thought the word “we” would emphasize his teamwork skills.
On the other hand, it had the opposite effect because the hiring panel was more concerned with evaluating his leadership and personal skills.
He wrote:
“I once failed an interview because I used ‘we’ a lot. I thought it projected me as a team player, but instead, the hiring team struggled to identify my specific skills, contributions, and impact.”
“Be comfortable with saying ‘I’ and focusing solely on what you accomplished.”
He further explained how the STAR method—used in behavioral interviews—allows the use of “we” in certain parts but emphasizes “I” in others:
“In the STAR method, ‘we’ can work in the Situation and Result. But in the Task and, especially, the Action, you want to use ‘I’.”
He provided an example:
– Situation (S): We were building a new team with some conflict.
– Task (T): I had to resolve the conflict.
– Action (A): I called for mediation.
– Result (R): We became a more cohesive team.
He also cautioned candidates to be mindful of interviewers who press for personal contributions:
“If your interviewer follows up with ‘So, more concretely, what were YOUR actions?’ you’re on thin ice. You need to switch up fast, or it’s likely a fail. The nice ones give you this window multiple times.”
As the post gained traction online, many individuals with similar experiences flooded the comment section to share their thoughts.
See some reactions below:
@iamjamesudom: “Didn’t know this was such a big deal until I found out there is a certain fortune 5 company that will never hire you if you ever use the word “we” in your answers irrespective of how great your achievements were.”
@OnukoguFavour: “This happened to me to. I had to learn and I constantly still learn how to say I I I when writing SOPs, letter of motivations and applying for scholarships. I dont know if this is a cultural thing, a nigerian thing or a personality trait that makes us retract back to we.”
@dod_arj: “Yes! I remember making the same mistake. I kept saying “we”, and the hiring manager hit me with, “So what did you do by yourself?” 😭 I was like, “The we is I too.” 😂 .”
@chuks_olisemeke: “My own was “Yeah”! The man (Founder/CEO) warn i shouldn’t use it again…so he asked if my younger ones is living with me i said “Yeah”..End of road.”
@RealVictorMosez: “I found myself in the same predicament, struggling to balance ‘I’ and ‘we’, until I learned the hard way that a strong ‘we’ is built on the actions of a responsible ‘I’.”
@Chimeriri_Kay: “As a team member, be clear on the role you played. Did you design and another implement, vice versa. If it’s a talent mgt team, are you a recruiter or you manage succession planning or L&D. Do you manage recruitment end to end or stop at sourcing, or yours starts at onboarding.”
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Published by Ejoh Caleb
